Some random thoughts
I wanted to send out some random thoughts as I approach my new "birthday" and the marking of 1 year since my last chemotherapy and my stem cell transplant.
I have a chest x-ray tomorrow and I pray that it is clear just like the last one. I believe every cancer patient has in the back of their mind what if, what if. It never goes away. It never leaves your consciousness even when you are at your happiest you always think that what if.
Not to belabor the point but November 15 will be the day I got the infusion of my own stem cells and started me on the way to recovery. October is the month last year that I went through thegrueling procedure called Stem Cell Transplant. I remember with great clarity the two shots a day for 14 straight days to entice my bone marrow to over produce stem cells and pour them into my blood stream for harvesting. I remember the 3 days I was hooked to an Apheresis machine that pumped my blood out and filtered out the stem cells; each session lasting 4 hours and exhausting me and Kaye because she had to witness it. I remember the move into the hospital room that would become my home for 30 days while my entire system was flooded with highly toxic chemotherapy. I had a panic attack that first night and I remember the panic of being closed in the room. I was not afraid of the treatment but of the procedure. I know that incarceration in prison must be mind numbing as you sit and ponder the small space you will occupy and live in. My heart goes out to those who must endure that.
It is October 2 and Kaye and I have traveled quite a bit. Two weeks ago we went to Pennsylvania for a tour of the Furmanos tomato plant. We stayed over and visited the Amish country and witnessed some beautiful countryside. The Amish still farm the land and the rolling hills around Lancaster Pennsylvania were covered with corn that was ready for harvesting. We fell in love with the simplicity of the Amish folks and the good people of Pennsylvania. Horse drawn buggies were abundant. The people of Pennsylvania exceeded our expectations as they were friendly and accomodating and little did I know but later learned that one of the favorite dishes to prepare in almost every restaurant is beef liver. One of my favorite dishes is beef liver and it indeed was available on almost every menu.
Last week Kaye turned 45 and we went to Elizabeth City. We had hope to go all the way to the outer banks but a miscalculation on my part left us 45 miles from the outer banks so we did not get to visit the ocean and feel the autumn breeze that makes this time of year special.
We will be going this weekend to the Mountain home of Bob and Lucille Morris; Kayes mom and stepfather. They are excited to have us as this is our first trip there. They live just above a trout stream so Bob wants to show me how to fly fish. I know the fall foilage will not be in full bloom but it does not matter we will be together and enjoy their company.
My nephew Carson turned 1 month old yesterday and we are anxious to see him for the first time this week!
I will let you know how the x-ray goes!
God Bless you all
Tim
I have a chest x-ray tomorrow and I pray that it is clear just like the last one. I believe every cancer patient has in the back of their mind what if, what if. It never goes away. It never leaves your consciousness even when you are at your happiest you always think that what if.
Not to belabor the point but November 15 will be the day I got the infusion of my own stem cells and started me on the way to recovery. October is the month last year that I went through thegrueling procedure called Stem Cell Transplant. I remember with great clarity the two shots a day for 14 straight days to entice my bone marrow to over produce stem cells and pour them into my blood stream for harvesting. I remember the 3 days I was hooked to an Apheresis machine that pumped my blood out and filtered out the stem cells; each session lasting 4 hours and exhausting me and Kaye because she had to witness it. I remember the move into the hospital room that would become my home for 30 days while my entire system was flooded with highly toxic chemotherapy. I had a panic attack that first night and I remember the panic of being closed in the room. I was not afraid of the treatment but of the procedure. I know that incarceration in prison must be mind numbing as you sit and ponder the small space you will occupy and live in. My heart goes out to those who must endure that.
It is October 2 and Kaye and I have traveled quite a bit. Two weeks ago we went to Pennsylvania for a tour of the Furmanos tomato plant. We stayed over and visited the Amish country and witnessed some beautiful countryside. The Amish still farm the land and the rolling hills around Lancaster Pennsylvania were covered with corn that was ready for harvesting. We fell in love with the simplicity of the Amish folks and the good people of Pennsylvania. Horse drawn buggies were abundant. The people of Pennsylvania exceeded our expectations as they were friendly and accomodating and little did I know but later learned that one of the favorite dishes to prepare in almost every restaurant is beef liver. One of my favorite dishes is beef liver and it indeed was available on almost every menu.
Last week Kaye turned 45 and we went to Elizabeth City. We had hope to go all the way to the outer banks but a miscalculation on my part left us 45 miles from the outer banks so we did not get to visit the ocean and feel the autumn breeze that makes this time of year special.
We will be going this weekend to the Mountain home of Bob and Lucille Morris; Kayes mom and stepfather. They are excited to have us as this is our first trip there. They live just above a trout stream so Bob wants to show me how to fly fish. I know the fall foilage will not be in full bloom but it does not matter we will be together and enjoy their company.
My nephew Carson turned 1 month old yesterday and we are anxious to see him for the first time this week!
I will let you know how the x-ray goes!
God Bless you all
Tim
posted by Tim | Wednesday, October 03, 2007
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